To understand wombooty, one must first consider the humble wombat. Wombats are adorable, like oversized plush teddy bears; to see one is to want to hug one. Yet wombats are thick and powerful, with deadly-strong legs and a cartilaginous posterior that can break the skulls of their enemies. Wombats do not care for convention; they are marsupials who happily wear their pouch backwards because it suits their burrowing lifestyle. Wombats do not apologize for not being lithe like a mink or dainty like a bunny. Defiant in their solidity, they will shit tiny bricks to safeguard their territory.

Wombooty, then, is a booty that embodies the irresistible cuddliness and audacious strength of the wombat. Wombooty delivers a spine-shattering kick to beauty standards that demand shrinking and starving and diminishing the authentic self. Truth is wombooty; wombooty is truth. Wombooty is seductive and fearsome, and is not concerned about becoming too big or too round or too muscular. Wombooty is anathema to haters; it is booty become Death, destroyer of worlds. Wombooty strives only to become more awesomely wombadass, and its mantle can be claimed by all who are inspired by the sprit of the wombat. Be bold, wombrethern, be strong, and remember that anything that can be crushed by wombooty deserves to be crushed by wombooty.